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so i quit my job this week

2011 ended great.  2012 began great. I'll post a Christmas update a bit later but suffice it to say I had a great December with my peeps. Sad my brother couldn't make the get together. 

I got to end 2011  with these folks

Yep. The scoreboard is correct (That would say "Auburn 43 Virginia 24") Auburn showed up.  You doubters. I yelled laughed and did some shakin.  As in shaking my shaker.  I'll post more on that later.  I am sure you didn't come here for the Chick Fil A Bowl 2011 play by play.  Or how two of my Christmas presents intersected to make Dec 31 a great day.

I quit my job.  That's what you want to hear about.

Hardest thing I have had to do in a long time. I love my job. I love the people i work with.  I love the people i work for.  But ever since I came to Arbor Springs I knew my time would end.  About 6 months after I started working there I felt in my heart that i knew the date I would leave "the Arbor" (as we love to call it).  And i am months past that date.  I just didn't know when/if I left where I would go.  So I stayed. 

Over the past 2 months people have been talking about me doing other jobs.  My sweet Texas BFF even started looking for jobs for me.  (I didn't ask her to. She just really wants me to move to be near her.) But I didn't feel like I should move.  And even though people now introduce me to others as "the girl who will one day live overseas" I don't know in my heart that I will live overseas 24/7/365.  As much as this 1st world America drives me nuts I feel like I am still called to help be a catalyst to cause folks to see outside their box and get involved with God's work.  I have always said that if I could find a job that I could work here part of the year and go overseas part that would be perfect and heavenly in my book.  Plus the thought of being overseas as a single person is overwhelming.  Not impossible, for anything is possible with God.  But tremendous issues exist because I am a woman overseas in the contexts i am interested in...issues.

So last week it just finally hit me like a freight train.  It is time to leave the Arbor.  Many many tears, prayers and sleepless nights/mornings later...I have turned in my notice.  My last official day is February 3.  I plan to work as needed there and will definitely be back to see my residents and amazing coworkers and smile on them as needed.

The plan- go to  AUM and get my whatever I need/masters thing so in a year (Fall 2013) I can teach.  Then my summers and holidays are free to go wherever and serve whomever. Here or there. Near or far. 

Challenge is, I am still in debt.  Now i have to figure out how to pay for school.  With a job that will be paying much less than now.  Sure I could stay where I am and go to school. And it would be amazing pressure.  But my time is over.  I cannot stay when I feel the Lord say move. 

Please pray- for the perfect person to take over my job to serve the families, residents and employees at Arbor Springs. 

- for my next job.  That I will serve in it with joy.

-for school.  for the timing to get it all done as soon as possible.  And to trust the Lord, and see His plan for paying for it.

I've been working on Brennan Mannings book Ruthless Truth.  I'd take a picture of it but a dog ripped the covers off of it this week.  As well as my journal.  Irony- the last sentence I wrote in my journal...I have to move on. No matter how hard.  That's the last page the dog left intact.  Guess it's on to the next chapter.  And a whole nother book (journal).

Happy 2012.  There is a lot packed into this year.  For each of us.  Let's press in to trust Him.  His plan. Not ours.  And be obedient to do what He says.  Even if it sounds a little crazy.

Tim Tebow and all his PDA

 Confession first- I was previously not a subscriber to what Tim Tebow did on any given weekend.  Unless it was a weekend he was playing Auburn.  Thankfully both those weekends turned out in Auburn’s favor.  I just couldn’t handle watching Florida play for any given reason outside of cheering on Auburn to beat them.  However, I did hear and read about his confessions of faith while he was at Florida.  And by the draft I was indeed interested in his future employer…Denver Broncos it will be.  I noted when he got his rookie head shave (not a fan). And when he finally started getting some playing time.   So call me a closet fan.

 

As the past few weeks go I have become more of a vocal fan.  I got to see his first “comeback” this season and a few since then.  And it doesn’t hurt that the man sports the orange and blue (my favorite color combo when it comes to sports).  And glory does he point to, kneel to, and honor the Lord.  And boy does it seem to rile folks up. 

 

I have been thinking about that the past week or so.  Why do people get so mad about it?  And I realized- it’s the PDA.  Yep. You know, the public displays of affection.  Just like your best friend who had to hold her boyfriends hand.  Or kiss him hello.  Or kiss him hello.  It annoyed you so much.  Why?

 

I am thinking that perhaps.  Just perhaps we get annoyed by SIMPLE PDA because we are jealous.  That they have a relationship where they are not afraid to show they love that person.  And we wish we did.  Perhaps the other person doesn’t like to do it.  Maybe they think it is “too much” in front of others.  Now, mind you I am not talking about the PDA we ALL dread.  As in “get a room” PDA.  But simple things. 

 

And perhaps they (Tebow haters) are jealous.  They don’t understand why Tim feels inclined to point to the sky. Bend his knee.  Speak honor to His king.  They don’t understand that every breath we each take is due him.  That the victories, the fight, the good, the bad, the ugly…we thank Him.  We praise Him.  We give him the glory.  It is what He is due.  It’s the least we can do.  So they talk smack.  They dis what they don’t understand.  What maybe they wish they had the guts to do.  Honor God in everyday life.  So they just keep on waiting for Tim to mess up. Say something dumb. Fail.  (it will happen. We all do it. We’re human.) And it makes me sad.  That folks can’t just be glad that someone delights in their job.  That they find satisfaction in what they do.  But ultimate satisfaction in something else…

 

Perhaps each of us should think how we can do likewise in our daily lives.  That others would encounter us and have no doubt that we have a love that we can’t help but give a little PDA to.  And it doesn’t hurt that Tebow backs up his signs and show with the words to back it up. 

 

I am encouraged by you brother Tim.  Keep after the prize. Speak the truth. Honor Him.  And if I can’t meet you on this side of heaven, I just might sport something Bronco number fifteen related.  Until I meet you around the throne on the other side. I thank you for your partnership in the gospel.  And yep, I’ll be cheering for you down here in Auburn. 

 

And this video with an inside look to the game made me smile.  Always wondered what they say during the games…Tim Tebow mic'd vs Bears

 

Beautiful day to pass out in the yard

Lest you readers think I'm an exaggerator (well I CAN be, but in this case no)...let me share a little history. I have lived 37 years on this planet and officially passed out 1 time. And almost passed out 2 times that I can recall. Add this morning and make that 3 times.
The only time I ever officially passed out was Thanksgiving weekend when I was in 11th grade. My brother and I drove to Tupelo to get our Paw Paw and drive to the cousins house in Bartlesville Oklahoma. The time was fun but from what I can recall early mornings with big breakfast and late nights doin a bunch of randomness with the cousins and their church friends. And benadryl...lots of benadryl. I'm allergic to anything with fur. And the cousins had animals with fur.
Sooo add all that up and factor in getting up at seriously like 430 or 5 am to drive back to Tupelo this chick was tired.
We drove through arkansas and I remember taking an earlier shift driving. I recall eating a couple of handfuls of cheerios in the backseat of the little blue car and being so past hungry when we got to a Mickey D's. I remember ordering as I literally leaned on the counter. And closing my eyes for a second. Next thing I know the lady has my food and holding out her hand for my money. I picked up my tray and turned to look for seating for the three of us. (The others were ordering). I remember seeing a table with some nuns in dark green habits and thinking- I just have to make it to that table over by them and I will be okay. Yeaaaah. As I finished this thought in my head I saw my tray drop out of my left hand, food sliding down off the tray onto the floor. Cut to me looking up at the ceiling and my brother looking down at me saying something along the lines of "are you okay?"
Yep. Passed out in McDonalds. On Thanksgiving weekend. Full house. Lots of drama. And my takeaway from this? Being irritated because my brother took my remaining cash and bought a second lunch. Dude the sweet manager coulda spotted me for a free second burger. And the fact that my aunt was convinced I was anorexic. This thought was established in her head because I don't eat a pound of food at 7 am and can't eat dessert right after a full meal. A. Not a big eater right after I get up. I gotta warm up to the day. B.  This branch of Longests eat dessert...about 30 min to an hour after dinner. More room ;). Now add in this Mc Donalds event, my cousins told me later my aunt was sure her theory was correct. To this day I feel compelled to finish whatever is on my plate whenever she is around. I order carefully when eating out because I can rarely finish a whole meal when eating out. Haha

  One of the times I almost passed out was at Six Flags in August waiting in line for the mind bender. Hot. hungry. The blackness drawing in. I literally sat down in the line and announced lunch and water was next on the agenda. Crisis averted. And thank goodness because this was the first family outing with Dad's new girlfriend who is now my stepmom Barbara. So glad that pass out at Six Flags drama was avoided.

Which brings me to my run this morning. Doing fine. 15 minutes into a 40 minute run. The lightheaded squirrely headed feeling hit. I'm fixin to go down. So I feebly stepped over to the shade. Laid down in the grass of the back 40 of the Porter compound while my ipod played "Shout to the Lord" and thought- "well, if my brain or heart exploded right now...this aint a bad way to go-listenin to shout to the Lord and lookin at the trees and sky on a beautiful day."
I'm still here. Heart beating, blood flowing, vessels intact, and still wondering why oh why did I start this running thing?
But grateful for the opportunities to use what I got. And enjoy what God gave me. But if I don't reply to calls or texts in a timely fashion it might be cause I'm napping (read passed out) out on the trail behind the cabin, so take a look for my crazy self laid out in the yard.

Happy sunday. Use what you got. Enjoy what God gave you. Especially on a day like today.

andi, do you even LIKE boys?

This week has been a full week.  And it’s only Tuesday morning at 12:34am.  But starting a week off remembering 9-11 Ten years ago followed by a typical “Monday” at work makes a week feel long.  That and it’s past midnight and I am wide awake.

 

I wanted to answer a question that comes up from time to time and some of you are thinking yet don’t feel courageous enough to ask (Because some of you would be appalled that the other some of you would even ask it to me).  So I will answer it for all of you wonderers.

 

“Andi, do you want to be married?”  or perhaps your question comes more in the form of “Andi, do you like boys?” 

 

Second version first- no.  Not boys.  I am into Men these days.  Boys was back in 1989 and that didn’t work out too well, waiting on my boyfriend’s brother to pick us up for our date because I was 14 and the guy I was “dating” was only 13, was just too time constraining.

 

Really.  I am 37 years old.  I don’t date. Much.  Okay, hardly ever. I don’t talk about boys. Well, I do but not much.  I don’t dress fufu.  I don’t get all giddy and flirty.  So some of you out there tend to ask yourself why. Welllllllllllll here’s the answers.  In no specific order or importance.

 

Fufu tends to not be utilitarian.  Or comfortable.  I have some fufu clothes- they restrain free movement. And my cute shoes hurt the snot out of my feet and squish my toes into a point.  Just not worth it most days.  So I save it up for special occasions.  And some days the fufu doesn’t hold up to my very active lifestyle.  Moments of awkward flashing might occur.  So I stay safe.

 

I don’t talk about boys or flirt or get all noticeably giddy because my eye is not on snagging me a man.  My job is not to seek out a man.  I cannot allow my role to be the one doing the seeking or the getting or the leading.  Or that will translate into the rest of my relationship with that person and based on prior experience- I need the guy to lead and do the decision making.  It just works best (and is biblical).  But trust me, when the feeling hits I will get and do get giddy.  Just most of the public won’t know about it.  Trust me, He will.  And my circle of trust folks.  But as I tell people “You all won’t live vicariously through my love life.”  Sorry.  It’s just too much to share for my girly interior.  But you can ask my friend Ryan who saw me being giddy over my boyfriend I snagged after the back to school 7^th grade dance- I was giddy.  As in “I will never not wear this sweater again.”  Please note the relationship lasted about 9 days before he was on to someone else.  But my sweet friend Ryan would probably tell you as she laughs about it- if she even remembers.  But I do vividly. 

 

I don’t date much because I cannot stand blind dates.  My ideal situation is knowing someone for quite some time and that guy deciding he would like to date me.  Past experience speaks truth to this.  The most successful (of my obviously “failed”) relationships worked best in this mode.  And if you want a laugh, just sit next to me and let me tell you about all the times I STUNK up the WESTERN hemisphere with my failing to break up well with someone.  I break up worse than…. Well…. Than a lot of things. 

 

I can undeniably tell you doubters out there that there I have dated.  I have falled in love.  I thought I had the man…  There was a guy back in my Texas days that saw me share my story on stage one Mothers Day at church.  He decided that day he liked me.  Over a year later we actually had some positive interaction at a youth event.  And some time later we began to hang out because we were both in the praise band at church.  Meaning, we talked and joked when we got lost while practicing our cover songs for church with the praise band on Wednesday nights.  We spent time going dutch to movies and sometimes group events. Spoke on the phone all summer while I was at camp.  When I  got back to town after camp it hurt to breathe when I thought about him. You can say I was in love.  He wrote the sweetest notes/letters.  Left them in the most creative locations during work and school.  And drew the funniest little cartoons.  Told the best stories.  Liked music. Liked kids.  Loved Jesus. But it didn’t work out.  He couldn’t be the leader.  I couldn’t trust him.  In the end it was all too hard.  It had to end.  Not the fairy tale story we girls tend to want.

 

Except for the end part it was perfect.  The way I want a relationship to develop.  Over time without all the “so tell me about your parents” drama over an awkward table at OCharleys.    And I KNOW the Lord is good.  And He could work it out over that table…but my prayer has always been that He would work it out the other way.  For that man to know my heart before he hears me ramble awkwardly over spinach dip alone somewhere in a restaurant.  For that guy to hear my heart for the Lord more than the word vomit that can sometimes spew out of my mouth when I try to fill silence.

 

For those of you who have wondered.  Who have questioned-why is Andi still single?  Please know that I am ok with it.  And I would be completely ok with a man who loves Jesus more than me coming along.  And thank you for wondering.  Thank you for wanting to find that someone for me.  I appreciate your heart.  For now I would ask you to do one thing- when I come to your mind, Pray.  Ask the Lord to do what He will in my heart.  And if that guy Is out there in His heart.  That he would step up and be the leader.  The man I know I need. For often days I don’t even pray much about it because then I will find myself wondering “Is this HIM?” Or is this the gathering where he will see me? Hmmmm so I ask you to pray for one of the few things that I don’t like to pray about.  I just set it back in the Almighty Loving Hands of the Man who Holds My heart today.   And if you know a guy who loves Jesus.  More than you think he would love a girl.  Then maybe have a party.  Invite us both over.  And then later think up some other event to have us around for.  And see what happens…

 

And I believe. I know. When the time comes, when that guy comes, the fufu clothes will have more occasion to start coming out of the closet.  But I will have to buy new shoes.

Until then...I'm gonna go sortof cute and comfortable. 

Andrew's journey

This is about 3 weeks late in coming... Sorry Andrew I am a slacker.

I have quite  a few cousins.  The boys Corey, Andrew, Steven-sons of my mom's brother Allen.  Then all the girls- Amy, Lare, and Rachel my Dad's sister's kids.  And my quasi cousins- My Dad's cousin Lois' girls-Alison, Karen, and Jennifer.  That's the family tree.

Amy is the oldest Smith daughter and she has some cutie kids.  Well, Andrew found out he had leukemia a few weeks back. 
He has a caring bridge page she has set up for posts, and photos, and such.  And It has been amazing to read.  The courage to face such uncertainty, crazy tests, never knowing if you will spend 2 hours at the clinic or  8. Or get admitted to the hospital.

Well, I just wanted to honor him as he fights the good fight.  And for his parents as they lead him through this road.  I love to read Amy's posts.  She's got an ongoing list of "things I have learned" that cracks me up.   It makes me feel like I am not the only one that notices crazy things in the world. (you know...what happens when you leave fruit in a hot car, elevator stories, "secret" hospital tunnels etc)

One really cool thing they shared about is his beads.  He strings a new bead as he encounters new things- This is what Amy shared-

Andrew has started his Beads of Courage.  Andrew chose to string the beads in (approximate) order of occurrence.  Each time he has a poke (IV start, port access, injections) he gets a black bead.   If he has a blood or platelet transfusion, he gets a red bead, and so on.  Each bead represents a treatment or procedure.  Each time we come in for outpatient treatment he will get a bead, or beads.  The large round bead is for an Act of Courage that he earned for enduring his port problems yesterday evening.  He and I had fun, remembering what happened each day since he came in, as we strung the beads. We took a picture of the guide, not sure how well you can see it. It is in the photo album since we can only put one photo with each entry.

I don't know if he is still keeping up with it.  But I thought it was really cool.  And unfortunately if he is keeping up with it...it probably will end up being a mile long.

I cannot help but think of all the kids, and the adults that go through this stuff everyday.  But I am always amazed new when it is someone I know.  And to see the grace and courage so many have in the middle of it all. 

Please pray for Andrew and his family as you may think of them.  And if you want to join their journey post a comment, message me, or email me your address (aalongest@gmail.com) so that I can get Amy to give you access to his caringbridge site.Or I think you can request it if you go to his page. He loves getting comments on "his" webpage.  So please take a second to give him a shout out.

On behalf of Him and His (immediate) family. Thanks.

www.caringbridge.org/visit/andrewisaac

 

a little wordle, a little videodle, a little noodle

no. no noodles.  Just have to put three things there.

I wordled my blog since I have internet tonight.  Thought I would share.  I love that ironing and applesauce made the cut.  And i was messing with the font I saw breaking and freaking as back to back words before i changed fonts.  ha oh how they go together so well. on this one breaking and tears are back to back. Oh wordle. how you know life so well...

And a video from my sweet friend Jami Smith.  (I had to watch it twice because I was completely distracted by the little bill video in the background - to figure out what it was) and a couple other great videos- thanks Samantha and Stina.  For those of you (Randy) without speakers. So sorry. You're missing out. Happy Wednesday. 

Did I mention there is a bathtub here? And I am dog sitting and I get one all weekend.  Oh joy to my sad little feet that have been so neglected from a good soak. Peace and cheddar. God is good. All the time. Even in the middle of craziness.

 

 Jami Smith on Psalms

 

 See you on Monday

 

I love the picture of Jesus with the little child.  I think it is my new favorite...

 

Laura Story Blessings

the bullets

let me give you a bullet point update list.  (apologies for the random and unimportant bullets included):

• State came last week to the Arbor.  All is good.  Thank you SO much for praying.  I can't tell you how much things have changed in a year.  And now we can work on focusing on the future and moving forward.  I cried in my car all the way from work to Ruby Tuesday's as I thanked the Lord for His goodness.  And Him showing His glory.  And His mercy and favor on the Arbor.  
• The stomache bug is ZERO fun.  Hits like a freight train and sucks the life out of a person.  If you know someone with it- love on them.  If you don't- be lucky.  And I'm praying you don't experience it this go round.  
• I upgraded back into the 2000th century yesterday. My phone now has the capability to not only send a picture message but to actually take a picture.  oh simplicity.  And oh how I shouldn't have spent the money, but I will keep it till I wear it out like I did my last phone.  Literally broke in half.
• Speaking of money...remember that fender liner I ripped off my car back in the fall?  Trying to be nice and not run over somebody's drill battery in the parking spot?  I fixed it last week.  Well found out yesterday that it was more broken than I thought- gotta get a new one.  Hello and good bye $70.  And the Honda Parts guy says ' you want to schedule for the service guys to put it back on for you?'  My sarcastic reply that remained unspoken- "For free?  Sure.  Thanks!"
• the Office.  If you don't watch it.  You should watch last week's baby episode.  I laughed out loud several times.  And if you are a parent...you should be able to relate to something in it.  Fun stuff.  And I'm not even a parent. 
• And please detour from here and read this post from Ericka Bennett.  If you do NOTHING else, Ever.  That I ask you please read this. It made my heart smile.  And it made my heart break. Ericka's Blog
• I love Goo Goo Car Wash and the people who work there.  Even when I don't do full detail, they are nice.  
• I love that spring is around the corner.  I have officially started working in the pastels in my work  wardrobe.  Beach April 23... can't wait. 
• Spring Break next week.  House sitting.  Anyone up for a party? :) Yeah.  I'm talking to you. 

Big ol bite in the butt

You ever have something you say come back and bite you in the butt.? (Apologies to all those who have issues with “butt” but this is my blog and that’s how I am thinking it…so I just gotta say it.)  I mean, it hurts.  Like a big rabid dog taking a chunk?  (I got bit by a dog once when I was little- scared me to death because I thought for a good 15 minutes I might have rabies and have to get shots and that was terrifying…more so than the bloodless bite on my leg).  Anyway…

So I didn’t really SAY this, but it came back around to me in such a way today I am once again amazed by God’s perfect timing.  This is awfully scattered- let me start at the beginning.

So if you read my last post, you know I have been on the run.  But in the midst of being on the run I have flung some truth out to some folks.  I finally finished a book a couple of weeks ago- Louie Giglio (Love the way the Lord speaks through that man).  It’s “I am not, but I know I AM”  I finished reading it, and a day later quoted about half a page or more to a friend of mine before I handed it off to her.  I told her she needed to read it and specifically a couple of chapters here and there. (Because I am so wise I know exactly what she needs to be reading…yeah, right).

Anyway.  Turns out she finished it.  It also turns out her dtr. In college saw her reading it and decided to pick it up and read it too.  And she did.  Read it in a day.  Yep. A DAY.  And then pretty much turns around immediately and typed up a pretty great summary of it all.  Quotes and all.  And put it on Facebook.  And tagged me in it. 

So here I am, basking in the light of “I’m so glad I am not running anymore” (I’ll blog on that in a little bit) and I get an email from the FB people…you got tagged.  I read the note and wept.  The truth I shared in book form with another came back to bite me in the butt.  In the most powerful way possible.  It was exactly what I needed to hear today.  The Lord’s perfect timing. 

Because, yet again I am still processing.  Pretty much figured out I would be okay, absolutely okay with staying or going.  With here or Uganda (or somewhere else).  And a friend tells me that she feels like she should be going to Uganda and how it may be that I am where I am so that she could know that.  So now I am thinking “Oh great, all this so I can get others to go and experience amazingness and I am stuck here!”  And the Lord says “Why?  Are you not going to be okay with that?” 

I want to be okay with it.  I want to say that is absolutely fine.  But somewhere in my heart I am not satisfied with it.  Where once I said “I want to help send people out there.  To see what God has in store for them.”  I now say “I want to go.  I want to be out there.  I want to be in the middle of it.”  Funny thing is, I may be in the middle of it.

So once again, I am back where I started.  The same place as this morning.  Saying “Yes”  Simply that.  To the next moment.  To the next divine appointment.  To the craziness of life.  Whatever that looks like.   And when I get down the road and look back I will see where it all goes and what it all was supposed to look like.   And today.  Today.  I am okay with that.  For the first time in awhile I am okay with that again.  With Him.  With here.  With the process.

So about that bite in the butt?  I needed it.  Desperately needed it to remind me of the truth of HIS word.  Of HIS plan.  Of HIM.  Because HE IS.  i am not.  “I AM”

God is good and He is perfect.  And so is HIS timing.

And I promise- everyday here won’t be a play by play…but I felt the need to put it out there. The other side.  The good side of trusting again.  It’s messy too. 

And hope she doesn’t mind but read on you'll see her FB post… you need to read it.  Then get the book.  Then read the original that inspired the book (the B-I-B-L-E).

 read the most incredible book today. Yeah.....I read the WHOLE book in one day. I literally could not put it down. A friend gave it to my mom and after I saw her nose glued in it the past couple of weekends I decided I would check it out when she finished. The title captured me at first but the text was absolutely what I needed to hear. God spoke to me so clearly through this book. He made me feel at peace but overwhelmed with tears.
I might be behind.....some of you might have already heard about it and read it.......but others, like me, might not have even heard of it until now! Let me know if you buy it and if God speaks to you like He did me! " i am not but i know I AM " Louie Giglio

Here are a few passages from the book that completely blew me away............................


" I am not, but He knows my name. 
I am not, but He has pursued me in His love.
I am not, but I have been purchased and redeemed.
I am not, but I have been invited into His Story, THE STORY.
I am not, but I know the Creator of the universe.
I am not, but I know I AM. "

" God was telling Moses during the story at the burning bush...............
I AM the center of everything
I AM running the show
I AM the same everyday forever
I AM the owner of everything
I AM the Lord
I AM the Creator and Sustainer of life
I AM the Savior
I AM more than enough
I AM inexhaustible and immeasurable
I AM GOD.

In a heartbeat, Moses knew God's name-and something more. He finally knew his. For if God's name is I AM, Moses' name must be I am not.
I am not the center of everything
I am not in control
I am not the solution
I am not all powerful
I am not calling the shots
I am not the owner of anything
I am not the Lord

That's my name too. And yours. I AM NOT. Just try it under your breath. "MY NAME IS I AM NOT!" 
I am not running anything
I am not head of anything
I am not in charge of anything
I am not the maker
I am not the savior
I am not holding it all together
I am not all-knowing
I am not GOD. "

One chapter of the book gave me a whole new perspective on the Sabbath........... It explained that "the day of rest" is not your normal, lazy, Sunday afternoon nap......but SO MUCH MORE!
" But be encouraged. Today is the Sabbath. Oh, it may not literally be Sunday, but Sabbath is a state of mind and attitude of the heart. Sabbath happens anywhere and everywhere we let go of the controls and lay the cares of our lives at His feet.
So where is your future right now? Where is the outcome of your pressing dilemma? Is it in your hands? Is it in the hands of a businessman or woman? Is it in the hands of a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife? Is it in the hands of a team of doctors?
Or is you life and all that concerns you, in the hands of the God who constructed the universe effortlessly in one week?
If you want more rest and less "stressed" declare this very moment your Sabbath - the place where you pry your fingers off of the circumstances and people who you are trying so desperately to control, the place you discover that life does work better in His hands instead of yours. "

The book explains how God has invited us to be apart of HIS STORY, THE STORY........but He is the Star. NOT US!
How do we know when we have slipped back into the story of us? We know when we see these telling signs:
When I live like I am privileged, I have lost the plot. In other words, when I start acting like I deserve a certain outcome or a higher standard of life, I have failed to strike the fatal blow to self and am living like I actually have rights in this world apart from God.
When I am demanding, I have lost the plot, insisting that God and others meet my needs on a timetable that I see fit.
When I act pompous, I have lost the plot, thinking that I am somebody while only providing that I haven't had a good look at God today.
When I crumble under pressure, I have lost the plot, declaring the outcome of life rests squarely on my shoulders, not His.
When I start protecting, I have lost the plot, marking turf as though it were actually mine and forgetting that I have comes first from above.
When I crave the spotlight for myself, I have lost the plot, losing sight of the story line and the one true Star. And every time I do it I waste one of life's fleeting chances to make my life truly count by amplifying Him.
When I fail to celebrate the successes of others who are living for His fame, I have lost the plot, thinking that possibly we are on different teams when we actually share supporting roles in the same story.

When I dwell on feelings of being uninvolved, unnoticed, or insignificant, I have lost the plot, abandoning the miracle of knowing God on a first-name basis.
All of these privilege, demanding, arrogant, frazzled, turf-protecting, glory-stealing, self-loathing moments are nothing more than a clarion call alerting us to the fact that it's time to die to self again, reminders that the life of smallness requires vigilant watch and constant willingness to strike the fatal blow in the heart of me. 
* But to die to self is to gain an unfathomable scale - a daily funeral that is nothing more than the doorway to a life filled with the matchless WONDER OF ALL THAT HE IS!!!


And in the days to come, when you are questioning, needing, searching, wondering, asking, and struggling, you will find His sufficiency at the end of every desperate prayer. When you cry out all the things that you are not, you will know His answer is, " I AM." 
FOR EVERY CRY THERE IS AN ANSWER:
I need help. I AM
I need hope. I AM
Who could possibly be smart enough to figure this out? I AM
What works? I AM
What lasts? I AM 
What's the latest thing? I AM
What's the hippest thing? I AM
I need a fresh start. I AM
I need a bigger story. I AM 
My vision is bigger than my resources. I AM
Nothing's real anymore. I AM
Who can I trust? I AM
I'm not sure who's on my team. I AM
Nobody's listening to me. I AM
I don't have a prayer. I AM
My marriage is sinking and I don't know where to turn. I AM
I can't hold on. I AM
My kids deserve more. I AM
I'm pouring into others, who's pouring into me? I AM 
If we fail who will get the job done? I AM
I'm not sure why I'm here. I AM
I've given all I can give and it's not enough. I AM
I'm tired. I AM
I quit! I AM

I can't! I AM
I need a drink. I AM
I need a fix. I AM
I need a lover. I AM
Somebody just hold me. I AM
....................And what does this great I AM say of Himself? He says to you and to me: "I am the way, I am the truth, and I am the life. I am the ressurection and the life. I am Savior. I am Jesus - the solution, the restorer, the builder, the answer, the Wise One, the Coming One, the Mighty One. I am the Lord and there is no other. I am God and there is none besides Me. I am the First and the Last. I am Alpha and Omega. I am the Beginning and the End. I am the Lord, that is My name, and I will not give My glory to another, or any of My praise to idols. 
I AM THAT I AM, and that is My name - My memorial name to every generation."

going a different direction

So, nothing super spiritual here...sort of, just some thoughts:

My house is pretty empty...you know the echoing sound that signals an empty house full of possiblities and ready to be lived in?  Well it is strange because I know I am leaving it.  Never done that before.  Left apartments and dorm rooms and such but never a "house".  It is sort of sad.  I just wish the rest could magically move on Thursday :)  I hope the next people enjoy my house as much as I did and still do.  I love it.  But I am leaving it- sort of fond farewell.  Sad to leave my porch swing and home made swing in the oak tree.   I ramble...

Tonight at my small group we are again talking about Ephesians and we came to one of my favorite parts- the second part of chapter 3.  And the word "immeasurably" was there... God has a better plan than often I even know to ask for.  I am glad.  Because my plans are often too small.  Saying "yes" then finding out what the plan is often is better than asking for the plan you want and God saying "yes" to it.  He IS the Creator of the Universe so OF COURSE He knows what He is doing. 

I am going to be off bloggy world for probably a week or so to get moved and settled and starting a job and going out of town.... so we will be in touch later.  

Peace to you and look for the "immeasurably" in your life today.  Sometimes it looks like an empty house but really it is a new opportunity to go somewhere else... 

my days are numbered

For the sake of keeping you faithful bloggy types updated...

My house sale is going through.  Termite guy comes tomorrow.  Closing is the 13th at 3pm :)

I am packing and sorting and getting ready for the missions yard sale Saturday 6:30-11am.  Bring your stuff Thurs/Fri and come buy stuff!

I got a new job.  I will be the admissions coordinator for the former Care Center of Opelika, now Arbor Springs.  I will be starting the same day my house closes... so much for keeping change and the associated stress down to a minimum. 

So sadly my days at the Chick are numbered.  And I am kind of sad.  I will miss hearing "Jesus Messiah" at 6am every morning.  I will miss making fun of some of my coworkers.  I will miss the free lunch. oh glad I kept some of those coupons I had before I started working there! :) I will miss bugging Spencer during the lunch rush.  Maybe I will work on a Saturday sometime just to keep up my skillz....hmmmm

God is amazing.  His plans are perfect.  He knows what He is doing.  In case you ever doubt it, just come see me.  I got stories.  And some scripture.  Astounded is where I am.